Wednesday, November 9, 2011

What's Scarier than Falling? Blending

I took an intermediate level painting class in college. I had recently earned a bunch of ART credits by taking a Portuguese written assessment and by resubmitting my AP Art History test score from high school. I just needed this painting class to meet the BA requirement and graduate. I should have been in Beginning Watercolor, but it wasn't offered my last semester. I had to get permission to be in the class with the real art students. Getting these last 2 ART credits was the easiest way to get a BA instead of going the BS route and would allow me to graduate ahead of schedule.
I liked painting, but I was no where near good enough to succeed at the "collegiate" level and I really didn't want this class to taint my GPA. After moving through some fairly easy assignments, the professor required us to paint something with difficult colors warning us that if we didn't paint properly, we would end up with a muddy mess. I painted with 2 of the difficult colors he allowed--red and green. Red and green together make muddy brown. I was so careful. There's only one tiny part of my painting that is muddy. I was pleased with my work, but it took a long long time. I still remember the pleasantly shocked look on his face when I presented my painting of a red apple on a green and yellow background. He told me, "Wow! I didn't know you had it in you! You took risks and it tuned out okay."

A while back, I poured my heart out about being scared to fall in love. He is an intelligent, hard working, kind, loving man. I had been afraid that I would love too much and get hurt in the end. It turns out that falling can be really fun if you have a partner that's falling in love right along with you.
Now, as we prepare to blend our lives together, the blending of our families is what scares me. I've heard of others' experiences with step children and step mothers and ex wives and realize that ours will be different. Different doesn't mean easy. Blending families can't be easy for anyone involved. I am so grateful to have a partner right along side of me as we begin the challenging process of blending.
This weekend my girls will get to have more time with him and Emerson, more than Kamryn, realizes that he and I may eventually marry. She sees him differently now than she did when she met him casually in September. She's texted him a few times and is pretty thrilled for his upcoming arrival.
His kids are excited to get to know me, my girls are excited to get to know him--but just like the "excitement" with new love--there will be many other feelings to experience. Here's to the hope, faith and charity we will need to blend these kids as carefully as possible. In the end, I hope to hear something similar to: "I knew you had it in you! You took risks and it tuned out beautifully."

3 comments:

  1. I love hearing how thoughtful you are of your children - so many don't take the time or acknowledge that once you have children, it's no longer just two in the relationship. Good luck blending! With your attitude and love for your children, your risks should turn out beautifully.

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  2. I just know this will turn out even better than the apple on the yellow and green background!!! You are going through all the right steps to make it successful!!! Sure love you!

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  3. Pray a lot, like I know you have been and you'll be inspired as to handle every situation. Our thoughts and prayers are with you. Remember how much we love you!

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